by Kittie W. Watson, Ph.D. and Becky Ripley, MS
“Leaders who don’t listen will eventually be surrounded by people who have nothing to say.”
-Andy Stanley
Bombarded by outside stimuli and distractions, it is difficult for listeners to focus. Instead of concentrating on the person speaking, many listeners are drawn to distractions other than the speaker. When listeners either consciously or unconsciously choose not to listen, speakers are out of luck. It is the listener who has the “power” to decide who, what and how to listen.
To increase influence, effective leaders, presenters and facilitators learn to listen to others before expecting others to listen to them. In fact, in a recent survey of corporate recruiters, effective communication and listening were rated as the top skills needed in leaders to influence and build robust talent pipelines. When leaders build strong relationships as “listening leaders,” they are more likely to inspire, engage and retain employees.
Leaders of influence recognize how important it is to listen first. They seek to gain insight and demonstrate understanding before advocating a position or point of view. They also appreciate how listening agility helps them adapt to listeners where they are. Leaders and workshop facilitators increase the likelihood of learning and influence when they consider how to approach learning from the listeners’ point of view.
Just as there is diversity in thought, there is diversity in how people listen. Strategic listeners are agile and leverage their listening by learning how to:
• Understand and adapt to differing listener preferences; and
• Conserve their own listening energy.
Understand and Adapt to Listener Preferences
Most listening patterns and habits are highly automated and consistent over time. Our research conducted with thousands of executives, managers, employees and students both in the United States and abroad over the last three decades has identified four distinct listener preference orientations: people, action, content, and time https://www.clomedia.com/2014/05/07/were-learning-are-you-listening. These preferences often determine how people engage, influence, and make judgments and decisions. Influential listening leaders and facilitators learn how to adapt to others to improve communication effectiveness and efficiency. Consider the following:
People-oriented listeners focus on the relationship and typically enjoy stories and anecdotes. Usually open-minded about topics of interest and the time they allow to listen, these listeners tend to care about relationships and want to trust the person who is speaking. To be effective with people-oriented listeners, get to know them prior to decision-making meetings, use personal examples, and include the names of people they know. Use the inclusive “we” language.
Action-oriented listeners prefer to listen to key points upfront; they appreciate a preview in outline form. They respond best to presentations that are well-organized, succinct and concise. Action-oriented listeners tend to scrutinize information, identify inconsistencies and become impatient with wordy speakers, extraneous information and too much detail. Usually clear about their expectations, they can jump to conclusions quickly and give direct feedback about what they hear. When information is valuable to them, they will engage and become more flexible with time.
Content-oriented listeners consider the data and facts when listening. Often preferring detail, they crave enough information to make a good decision and want to consider all sides of issues. They usually ask a lot of questions and require information and evidence before deciding. Enjoying complex technical information, content-oriented listeners often prefer data/statistics or expert opinion rather than anecdotal perspectives. Not as concerned about time, they want to ensure that others have done their homework and are thoroughly prepared with backup information and detailed support.
Time-oriented listeners are very conscious of schedules and often give specific time parameters for meetings and conversations. The most impatient of all the listener types, these listeners may interrupt wordy speakers and expect agendas to be followed precisely. Sometimes confused as action-oriented, time-oriented listeners are most focused on their own schedules and may tune-out or walk out when speakers go over time limits.
Most audiences are made up of a variety of listeners. It is best to understand the differences and adapt accordingly. Beware that while listeners have a primary preference, many have two or more high preferences. For example, leaders and customers may be more people-oriented with individuals they like, and more time-oriented with those they don’t. It is best to prepare messages to include all members of your audience. For example, since action and time-oriented listeners focus on getting to core issues quickly, it is effective to give an executive summary that covers key points to ensure the most important information is covered upfront. They can provide more detail during question and answer sessions. Remember, we all have our own listening preferences. When we listen to others in habitual ways, we may not be as effective or influential.
Note: Research results using the Listener Preference Profile (Watson & Barker, 2015; Ripley & Watson, 2014; Weaver, Watson & Barker, 1996; Watson, Barker & Weaver 1995) suggest that approximately 40 percent of the general population use a single-listener preference. Of this percentage, people- and action-oriented preferences are the most prevalent. About 25 percent of the general population has two listening preferences and about 15 percent of the general population has three or four preferences.
Understand and Conserve Listening Energy
The second factor that influences how people listen is their own listening energy. Agile, strategic listeners with insights into their own emotional intelligence, learn to focus more on the needs of others rather than on themselves.
It is especially important to consider a person’s ability to pay attention. After a good night’s sleep, we begin the day with a full tank of listening energy. If listeners were short-changed on sleep, they start with limited capacity. Throughout the day, the stress of meetings, phone calls, interruptions and other demands deplete energy and lead to listening fatigue. Without intentional conservation, many of us use as much as 50% of our listening energy by mid-morning. By noon, our energy may be even lower, and without a way to recharge by the end of the day, most people are running on fumes.
Effective professionals adapt to the listening energy needs of others as well as to their preferences. To make the most of peak listening time, consider ways to help listeners recharge. Encourage others to take a minute or two for deep breathing, take a quick silent walk around the building, keep a photo of a favorite place to submerge into for a minute, listen to classical, word-free music, etc. Schedule important meetings during high listening energy times, and if you feel participants’ energy waning, call a break or pause for a meditative moment of deep inhalations and exhalations. These intentional mini-breaks are an effective way to replenish our own and others’ listening energy tanks.
Reminder: There Is No One Best Way to Listen
While listener preferences are neither good nor bad, the best communicators go beyond their own preferences to better match individual and group listener needs. Understanding listener preference patterns helps people build better relationships and increase engagement and influence. Both Tom Peters and Stephen Covey were prescient when they predicted that listening would be a key leadership skill in the 21st century. Listening agility enhances emotional intelligence and is widely recognized as one of the most influential skills for communication and leadership success.
Kittie W. Watson, Ph.D., President and founder of Innolect Inc., is a trusted advisor to Fortune 500 C-suite officers seeking to accelerate positive business results today and create legacies of excellence for the future. Internationally known as a communication expert, she served as the youngest Chair of the Department of Communication at Tulane University. A 2017 Top 100 woman-owned CEO, she is the author of 15 books, has been featured on ABC’s 20/20 and other publications including: American Medical News, Money and Glamour. Two of her most recent books are Leadership Coaching: The Fast-Track to Effectiveness and 21 Days to Smarter Listening.
Rebecca A. Ripley, MS, is the Excursion Learning and Sustainable Legacies Practice Leader for Innolect, Inc. Becky led a nonprofit organization early in her career, worked in corporate HR, and is committed to helping organizations become productive places where individuals thrive. Whether in the role of coach, consultant or team facilitator, she helps to unleash the potential for high performance at both the individual and system level. Clients praise her listening skills and her practical, solution-oriented approach. Becky coauthored Leadership Coaching: The Fast-Track to Effectiveness and Innolect’s Flip Focus resource, The Listening Leader.
Innolect is a global leadership and organization development firm that prepares executives and their teams to succeed in high-performance, high-integrity workplaces. To learn more about Innolect’s innovative approach to development, visit innolectinc.com for free downloads of articles and resources.